In which Johndave try to watch movies
by sapphicGarland
Summary: Alternatively: Sex God Nic Cage gets ignored.


Dave stares at his boyfriend in dull irritation for the fifth time that day. He wasn't shocked by his antics anymore and had given up on trying to beat him, deciding the constant battle to one up everybody else should die with his brother. John's prankster gambit once again filled up, recognizing the cake-spattered face of John's boyfriend.

"I literally just took a shower, Egbert! Now you've covered me in gooey, flour and icing, dooming me to a cold shower as heartless as you."

John took his glasses off to save them from the tears clouding his vision from the uncontrollable laughter. He stuttered out a barely coherent sentence between snorts and giggles, "Aw, Dave, don't be like that! You love my gooey baked goods."

"Gross, Egbert. Gross."

"Why don't I make it up to you? We can chill and watch some movies."

Dave's eyes narrowed in playful suspicion, "Are you suggesting...Netflix & Chill?"

John laughed, "More like Nic Cage & Chill."

Dave rolled his eyes, leaving for the bathroom, "Fine! But you owe me that 'chill'!"

After Dave's unusually short shower (presumably from the cold as he used up all the hot water last time), John came in with the popcorn, finally allowing Dave to press play. As Con Air finally rolled onto the TV, the couple cuddled into one another.

Dave had first watched Con Air for the irony, and once he determined that it was, indeed, a horrible movie, he watched it for John. He was determined that he could distract his boyfriend from 'Sex God Nic Cage'...one of these days. He would win.

As John watches Nic Cage reading the letter from his daughter, tears fill his eyes just as they always do. Dave shakes his head, bringing John closer,* "You're ridiculous, Egbert…"

"It's sad, Dave! A little mistake and he gets thrown in prison, missing so much of his daughter…"

Dave rolls his eyes, watching John for the perfect moment to strike. He couldn't let John get too into the movie, but he couldn't distract him now. John would just push Dave away like always. What was his least favorite part? That was a hard one...the entire movie was his favorite part! There had to be a moment John was willing to break away from, though. Maybe when they're loading the plane?

Sure enough, John seemed just a little less interested as the men on screen sweated under the heat of the sun, enduring pat downs and introducing characters John knew better than he knew Colonel Sassacre's Daunting Text of Magical Frivolity and Practical Japery, which was like his bible.

So, Dave took a chance, leaning in and giving John a quick kiss, lingering for just a moment, just enough so he knew John would want more. Dave was a master at this by now, he knew more about John that about irony. Just as Dave expected, he only had to wait a couple seconds before John reached over for another kiss, longer this time. Dave held him there, not letting him go back to the movie but instead keep his attention where it should be. Dave smirked into the kiss, knowing it worked as John gave in, leaning into Dave. The blonde pushed his boyfriend against the back of the couch, caressing his face. John's lips didn't taste nearly as sweet as the victory, but then again that comparison wasn't fair; nothing ever did. Dave broke the kiss for air, only to trail small kisses down the boy's neck, enjoying the sweet mewing of John. It was then Dave realized his mistake. As soon as John's eyes opened, they returned to the movie. John pushed Dave gently off him, realizing his favorite part was coming.

Dave groaned in defeat, reluctantly getting off his boyfriend. John quoted the movie under his breath, "Put the bunny back in the box."

Dave shook his head, leaving to get more popcorn. He had to come up with a plan. Something to distract John from that declaration-stealing hunk on the TV. Food porn didn't work very well last time, John practically threw up last time he tried that.

He shook his head in defeat, finally just plopping down next to John and handing him the popcorn. Maybe it was time for him to give up. He had to face the music. I mean, who could beat Nic fucking Ca-

John stopped Dave's thoughts right then, pressing their lips together and wrapping his arms around Dave's neck. Dave hesitated, taken aback for a just a moment before kissing back, the long make-out session ending in pants and giggles.

"What was that for? Nic Cage not good enough for you?" Dave teased, still staring into John's blue eyes.

John laughs softly, kissing him once more, "Not good enough to beat you."


End file.
